The Withington Pub Quiz League


24th March 2004


WQ Fixtures, Results & Table

WQ Teams

WQ Archive Comments Question papers

Results & Match Reports

  • Fifth Finger thumbed their noses at Opsimaths to record another easy win, leaving themselves impregnable at the top of the table - 6 points ahead, a game in hand with 4 to play

  • St Caths got back to winning ways beating the History Men and thus moving up to join them on equal second place behind the Doughty Digits

  • Stumped, meanwhile, slumped at the Cricket Club - this time to the mighty Brains

Gerry's match report from South West:

Spent hormones and brain cells all over our table last night as we swamped Stumped 46 - 25.  After a malingering start our team has now hit top form though one suspects we have started our challenge for the Championship about 15 weeks too late.
"We did it for Fr. Megson's cousin, Fr. Ranieri", said the team.  "He will still get the chop at the end of the season, but at least his Italian is improving".

We thought the questions were excellent.  Nothing too fancy but covered a wide range of subjects and left room for brain power, not just knowledge, to be utilised.  We were very impressed by the anagrammatic link questions Crimea/Mercia and Rhone/Heron.  Same again next time, Piggies, please.

Please give an honourable mention to Stumped Eddie's young daughter, Laura, who stood in as a last minute replacement QM.  She was truly terrified to begin with but ended up ruling with a fist of iron and putting Roger firmly in his place.  There is something very touching about the QM saying "now it's your question, dad."   Eddie's instantaneous anagram solving also impressed us.    Obviously far too many TV dinners in front of COUNTDOWN in that household.

  • Albert kept ahead all the way until the last round and then blew it, losing to the reviving X-Pats

  • Ethel Rodin played a most enjoyable, close, and fluctuating game against Snoopy's Friends eventually squeaking a victory

Quiz Paper Verdict

This week's setters were the Electric Pigs.  I am very grateful to those of you who report the results, as you usually pass some interesting judgements on the evening's paper thus giving me some fodder to help write this.  Comments this week were once more pretty favourable.  A good snappy paper with most of the questions nicely targeted at the grey area half way between being dead certain and not having a clue.  The anagram's were a nice touch.  Gerry's match report above reflects the comments received fairly accurately. 

The average aggregate score this week was 73.6.  Actual aggregates around the games varied from 79 (Opsimaths/Finger) to 70 (Ethel/Snoopy's & Albert/X-Pats).

The Question of the Week

Plenty of good candidates for 'Question of the Week' but the one chosen by Fifth Finger in our match was Round 1 Q5:

Seven members of the Shadow Cabinet - Francis Maude, Archie Norman, Bernard Jenkin, Lord Strathclyde, Peter Ainsworth, Oliver Letwin and David Willetts - all made news on the same day in October 2000.  Why?

(to see the answer to this and all the other questions click here.)

.....and whilst on the favourite question theme, Finger Barry suggested that front runner candidate for Question of the Year has to be Stumped's recent magnificent split face question (25th February - Round 7 Q5):

(click the picture to link to the paper and get the answer)



You may recall that we had a vote at the end of last season on changing from Wednesday to Thursday evenings as our regular match day.  It was a close run thing but Wednesdays just won the vote.  Chatting to the teams at the Oak a few weeks ago there was a feeling that the groundswell for Thursdays has increased and that we need to have another vote.  Can we please use the website as a sounding board for this issue?  I'll publish any feedback I get.

Feedback 1:

St Caths and X-Pats discussed this issue after their recent match and were firmly in favour of sticking to Wednesdays.

Feedback 2:

Copland has come back saying that Stumped also vote strongly against switching to Thursdays.

Feedback 3:

Mary O'Brien (Albert) favours keeping to Wednesday - at least until we've had a chance to debate the issue again at this season's gala night.

Feedback 4:

Ethel Rodin are finding Wednesdays at the Red Lion almost impossible to negotiate, what with wide- screens and football at every turn.  They would favour moving to Thursdays.

Feedback 5:

On balance the Fingers wish to stick with Wednesdays.

Refurbishment at the Red

We now know that the Red Lion will be closed on Wednesday March 31st and Wednesday April 7th.  The History Men are at home both weeks, so, Ivor, can you rearrange the venue for your Fifth Finger (31/03) and Snoopy's (07/04) matches?

All please note that on both Wednesdays the Fletcher Moss will be the question-paper pick up point.

Fr Megson

South Reeks Reporter Postbag

Last week's cringing homage to Tonyism has caused waves of nausea around the Reeks and, with it, a rather pustulent swelling in our postbag this week.  Which in turn has led to a spate of ruptured paper boys especially on the Carrauntuoil round.  Windblown copies of our hallowed organ have draped themselves around lampposts as far south as Droitwich, a town which never before in its long history has been known to be swamped by culture.

Our long held editorial policy, as ratified by our local Lib Dem councillor, is to print only those readers' letters that pertain to the peril of dog turds in the windows of Estate Agents or to the even greater risk of a rash of chip pan fires breaking out in unlicensed local massage  parlours, and, of course, to the social scourge of taxis that go beep in the night.  Here then is a brief selection of letters that we considered too interesting to print:

A judge called Tony Cascarino who presides over a bench in the Marie Louise Gardens every morning until the pubs open, writes to say that he strongly objects to being likened to Claire Short:

"Don't let the accent or the hair style fool you", he cautions, "the honourable lady from the Bull Ring, and I, have nothing in common.  Au contraire, my nanny is of the opinion that, on a clear night, my angelic good looks tend strongly to favour a young Tony Curtis. (ED. NOTE: he means the guy who used to play Baldric in Blackadder).  Indeed in the early 80's when I had a weekly spot at Foo Foos many young men of indeterminate gender were wont to climb on stage and beg me to autograph their Some Like It Hot videos.  I rest my briefs.

"Incidentally, when the other less good looking Tony was in Vespers last week I don't suppose he mentioned if he had anyone in mind for the vacant Lord High Executioner job.  I wouldn't mind having a bash at it myself although the early starts might pose a problem during the quizzing season.  Let me put it through my mental blender and I will get back to you next week with a nice bowl of pea and ham soup."

Raising the decibels somewhat a Fr. Paisley, an apprentice Moderator in the Church of the Poisoned Chalice over in the diocese of Little Britain, Rockall and The Calf Of Man, fumes to the point of self-inflicted tinnitus:

"I enjoyed last week's exposé of what really goes on at Vespers Sauna and I enclose my membership fee for 20 years.  I must however break the habit of a lifetime and rant against the quiz recently set by Ethel Rodin.  I have nothing against the good lady in question.  Indeed, over the years, I have taken much solace and solitary pleasure from Ms Rodin's "KISS" - but her quiz was an abomination in the sight of my lodge.  What do you mean, do you breed beavers over there?  Beavers are vile playthings of the Devil with sticky-out teeth just like Bernie Winters and how abominable is that?  Shut up and let me rant in peace!  To have one round on popery could have been excused as an attempt to please an old bigot by teasing him almost to the point of blessed release but to have FOUR - d'ya hear - I said FOUR rounds on POPERY in ONE quiz means war.   Step outside now Ms Rodin and choose your instrument of perdition.

P.S. Could you send me an autographed photie and maybe a used neckerchief?"

The Editor Replies:

It was POT POURRI you deaf old goat.   'Pot Pourri' - French for rotten pot.  Speaking of which, have you taken your Epsom Salts yet?  Take a Lem Sip as well and get back into bed or I'll tell the duty nurse you tried jumping out the window in your longjohns last night to go to the Westlife concert.   Go on.  Into bed NOW.  And don't forget the magic words: 'Teeth and toilet'.

P.S. The editor's decision is final in these matters and you ARE a deaf old goat.  Breaking away from the Editor's tradition of saving the best till last, we end this week with a letter from a raddled Opsimath who ekes out a meagre living by solving frameworks - he can't manage the actual crossword clues yet, just the frames!   He writes tediously:

"Here's an interesting thing" (you just know instinctively at this stage that it won't be - ED.).  Whilst putting last week's article through my siege engine I sat up as if galvanised when I noticed that you had used the word "bathos".  It certainly is a small world, as they say (inhabited almost exclusively by small-minded people - ED.).  My great great grandmother's name was Bathos - Bathsheba Bathos to be precise, which I always try to be.

"I have done extensive research, sometimes to the detriment of my conjugal lifestyle, and I have discovered that she was a 16 year old ploughgirl from Horsham when my great great grandfather claimed her as part of his Droit de Seigneur package on a windy bluff overlooking what is today East Grinstead's prestigious new National Bus depot.

"Now my great great grandfather would have been one of the Thynne-Baths (the first component thereof being rather idiosyncratically pronounced "tin").  They were a very old Norman family who came over with William The Conqueror.  William's motto, as every schoolboy and some of the better disciplined schoolgirls know, was "Honi soit qui mal y pong" which of course means in translation "never leave home without taking a bath".  William seems to have taken this motto very literally because legend says he never went anywhere, not even on a date, without having a Thynne-Bath dancing attendance on his every move.  A 'By Royal Appointment' sanitary ware business was thus born and the family duly cleaned up south of the Wash although they were less successful when they tried introducing the heathen concept of hygiene into West Yorkshire.

"You and your readers will be intrigued to know that our family Coat of Arms still features "un chat mèchant pissant dans le bain" on an avocet background.  Avocet is, of course, the heraldic term for avocado.  Fascinating, I'm sure you'll agree.  I could talk about this subject for hours and I feel sure that you would be delighted to listen.  When are you free?"

Not now. Michael.  Not ever.