Results & Match Reports

• Snoopy's returned to form by beating the History Men and putting themselves back in the  hunt for second place

• In a seesaw contest at the Oak the Brains eventually came out on top against the Opsimaths

• St Caths just edged home against the Albert Park triptych putting themselves back in second slot

• Electric Pigs hoicked themselves up the table by thrashing the only team to have inflicted defeat on the league champions this season to date, that is Ethel Rodin

• Fifth Finger completed their home fixtures with a resounding victory over the X-Pats

Quiz Paper Verdict

This week's setters were the Albert.  There were mixed views on the paper.  Kieran writes:

"Good straightforward quiz, I thought.  Liked the new question on rhyming answers (Round 3 Q1 & Q2).  Question of the week?  Well I didn't know there was a statue of a sea horse above the entrance to the Midland, nor that there is a Rothschild's giraffe.  However I'd go for the one about the Christian symbols (Spare Q5) - that must be why there are so many pubs called the Hope and Anchor - I never knew that."

At the Oak we fell foul of the question that had 'a comet' as the answer (Round 6 Q8).  Any old comet?  We spent a good deal of effort trying to think of which comet and then gave up and passed the question over.

The average aggregate score this week was 65.8.  Actual aggregates around the games varied from 59 (Brains/Opsimaths) to 71 (Finger/X-Pats).

The Question of the Week

I agree with Kieran's sentiments above but our choice as 'Question of the Week' was (Round 8 Q2):

What links the following American politicians: Herbert Hoover, Alf Landon, Wendell Wilkie and Thomas E Dewie?

(to see the answer to this and all the other questions click here.)

Chatterbox

T'Cup

We finish the league season in 2 weeks time so Gary has been focusing on the annual cup competition.  The form will be exactly as last year.  In other words the X-Pats have opted to sit on the sidelines so that they can better observe the Wednesday Football whilst the rest of us struggle with the humungously complex system that is the Donely recipe for t'Cup.

The draw has already caused some controversy.  St Caths (the perpetual Arsenal of our league, perhaps?) are incensed at the way the balls have tumbled out of the bag and the resultant fixture commitments that have been placed on them in the run up to the end of season.  Dave Blythe writes:

"Moving on to Cup matters, I have to report that the draw for this season's competition has been greeted with extreme suspicion in the marbled halls of St Caths HQ.  As Cup holders, we naturally expected to be seeded straight through to this year's final, but this is far from the case.  We enter the climax to the league season needing 3 points from our final 2 games to clinch that all important second Champions League spot, and we're going to have to do it the hard way, as we close with a home game against the League Champions, followed by an energy-sapping trip across Europe to take on Snoopy's Friends.  We had been hoping to fit in a training week in Marbella to recuperate before the knockout tournament, and I know that Mike Heale in particular was looking forward to a spot of roasting.  Instead we find ourselves pitched straight into Cup action, taking on Snoopy's for the second week in a row.  If we overcome this tricky hurdle, our 'reward' is another game against the Braggarts at their Didsbury Road base, in a repeat of last year's final.  Surely most neutrals would have preferred to see these two teams contesting this year's final as well, as the most fitting climax to another fine season in the world's strongest quiz league?

 

We are naturally reluctant to criticise the organisers of the world's oldest knockout competition, but I have to say that this turn of events leaves a bitter taste in the mouth, and it's more Banks's than Marston's.  Rumours were sweeping Didsbury last night of shady deals, secret meetings in smoke-filled backrooms, and even of a pair of balls being popped in to the microwave for 10 minutes before being put in to the traditional velvet bag.  I used to think Alex Ferguson was paranoid, but now I'm not so sure."

I think next year we will have to appoint an observer to watch Gary closely as he shakes his balls and goes for the draw.  We simply can't have the league's good name dragged through the mud each year.  Any volunteers?

To get the basic Cup facts (like who plays whom - and who is setting when)  follow this link to see the fixtures page.

Thursdays?

You may recall that we had a vote at the end of last season on changing from Wednesday to Thursday evenings as our regular match day.  It was a close run thing but Wednesdays just won the vote.  Chatting to the teams at the Oak a few weeks ago there was a feeling that the groundswell for Thursdays has increased and that we need to have another vote.  Can we please use the website as a sounding board for this issue?  I'll publish any feedback I get.

Feedback 1:

St Caths and X-Pats discussed this issue after their recent match and were firmly in favour of sticking to Wednesdays.

Feedback 2:

Copland has come back saying that Stumped also vote strongly against switching to Thursdays.

Feedback 3:

Mary O'Brien (Albert) favours keeping to Wednesday - at least until we've had a chance to debate the issue again at this season's gala night.

Feedback 4:

Ethel Rodin are finding Wednesdays at the Red Lion almost impossible to negotiate, what with wide- screens and football at every turn.  They would favour moving to Thursdays.

Feedback 5:

On balance the Fingers wish to stick with Wednesdays.

Fr Megson

The Big Match - Souvenir Programme

The B-League fixture between Arsenal and Chelsea has been brought forward by 24 hours this week so as not to clash with the eagerly awaited meeting of those mediocre Titans, Opsimaths (Harry) and Brains of Oak (Aunt Sally). Stakes could not be higher with the winners expected to move into a pivotal mid-table position a mere 20 or so lengths behind the heavily weighted and blinkered pacemakers George the Fifth.

To mark this historic anticlimax we are publishing a special souvenir edition of our match programme Dope Test. John Dennison who, as not many people care, now plays for the Brains but continues to have his pints bought for him by the Opsimaths, has kindly agreed to be our centrespread model (watch out for those unsightly staples, John) and to answer our fanzine questionnaire.  Please be aware that John was suffering from a mild and bitter hangover during the photo shoot and interview and cannot therefore be held legally responsible for any material contained therein which might lead to a breach of the peace.

 DOPE TEST(DT): John, welcome to the club.  I’m sure you must be very excited at the prospect of tonight’s      clash of the mediocre Titans.

 JOHN:  Not really.  You have sausages, perhaps?

 DT:       Judging by your accent you’re not a local lad made good, are you?

 JOHN: Nice sausages.  You have ketchup?  No, neither local nor made good.  I born in West Yorkshire but shortly my father he was moved to Siberia for reading Jeffrey Archer novel when he should have been hosing down pit pony.  I am happy to be native of Irkutsk.  Is much trendier than Bradford.

 DT:       But your name is English?

 JOHN: Da and nyet.  Is Anglicisation of real name.  In my corrective camp when I join playgroup is already another Ivan Denisovich - very boring man.  Always writing boring things in diary like “today I eat rotten potato”.  Not so good thriller writer as Jeffrey Archer.  So they translate my name to John Dennison.  Is unpronouncable and silly name, yes?  In Reeks they call me Sean McDenis and also other names which I am not understanding.

 DT:       So you joined our quiz league for fame and fortune?

 JOHN: Da spasibo.  Also beer.  Also sausages.  I have very good agent.  Best in all of gulag.  He insisted I must have own bed-sit with key.  Also own toaster, porringer and television set.  Is very good television set. Receives not only black but also white.  Is very cosy to cuddle up with Ant and Dec at weekend and toast hot buttered sausages.

 DT:      And have you adjusted to our language and weather?

 JOHN: Da.  Language is more littler problema than I have used to thunk.  I only have major problema with  language as she is bespoken if I am leaving my bed-sit.  Weather also is better than I have thunk.  I think your summers very much similar to our winters in Siberia.

 DT:      And has Fr. Megson taken you under his wing?

 JOHN: Da.  Chicken wings also very nice.  Especially spicy ones from Marx and Spenglers.  Fr. Megson is very influential man.  But I have met him only once.  We were in changing room after once more big big defeat. I remember Roisin and Jane were very unhappy to share shower with six drunken men and Damian.  Fr. Megson strode in manfully like John Wayne, only without horse, you understand. He call team together in very wet huddle and announce in very powerful voice: “No more chocolate bikkies for you lot ‘cause all you do is eat them!”  Then he kiss me on both cheeks, ask me for a tenner to support very sick animal in 3:10 at Uttoxeter and is gone.  I think Fr. Megson is very spiritual person.  He is perhaps the Rasputin of the Reeks.  Maybe one day Boney M will write famous song in his honour also..Ra... Ra.... Rasputin.  Is very splendid song, no?

 DT:      No.  You can go back to your bed-sit now.

 JOHN: Spasibo. You want to buy rabbit-hat?