Withington Pub Quiz League - quizbiz 27/10/10

SPW, the Pigs and the Charas all remain unbeaten at the top whilst Father Megson returns below

Results & Match Reports

Despite a sterling six 2s from WWTBAM star Dave Rainford the Prodigals lost at home to the Historymen

Albert fought to a nail-biting finish just losing out to visitors Ethel Rodin

SPW (with Martin notching up seven 2s) just proved too strong for the Opsimaths

Calluna Pussycats lost the 'battle of the basement' against TMTCH

Compulsory Meat Raffle couldn't match the might of the visiting Bards

Quiz Paper Verdict

This week's paper was set by The Electric Pigs. I managed to talk to 5 of the teams face-to-face during the course of the evening and they all thought it was an excellent paper - even those suffering defeat. The average aggregate score was lower than last week's 77.4 from the Opsimaths but was nevertheless very respectable at 71.2. In the SPW/Opsimaths game there were 7 unanswered questions which seems about right to me. Hangman Dave summed up everyone's feelings with his "best quiz of the season so far" comment.

So all in all an enjoyable evening's pub quizzing courtesy of all the Pigs.

The Question of the Week

SPW voted this week for Round 2 (the one with the stand-up comedian theme) Question 5 ("at least it led to someone who could raise a titter unlike the answer to question 6 which led to a brace who'd never raised anything" as Barry put it):

Which alcoholic drink, manufactured by Gilbeys has an alcoholic content of 17% by volume and was introduced in 1974?

For the answer to this and all the week's questions click here.

Father Megson

Last Quango in Ladybarn

A Chairde,

Groans of apathy and cries of "shut the fcek up, I'm trying to watch Loose Women", greeted gorgeous George Osborne last Wednesday as he stood up in the gilded splendour of the White Swan's taproom to unveil his ambitious plans for making Ladybarn a half tolerable sort of place to live in by the end of the century.

His promise to phase out students by 2013, thus affording every pensioner in South Manchester the opportunity of buying an untidy second home was greeted by angry murmurs of "Why just the students? Why have youse stopped picking on the fcekin Irish?"

His more controversial plans to scrap the outmoded Department of Work and Pensions and replace it with a comprehensive network of kiosks that would provide the sick and the needy with Green Shield stamps that could be used when making any purchase under a tenner from the popular Innovations catalogue were given a cautious reception but rapturous applause soon followed when Mr Osborne gave an assurance that the congenitally stupid, those incapable of winning a quiz, would still qualify for a free pint every Wednesday night for the rest of their lives.

The room finally exploded with enthusiastic demands for "three cheers for the smarmy Tory git in the fcekin suit" when the Chancellor announced that the first £25 of all the monies freed up by making the Police responsible for pre-natal care and the collection of wheelie bins on alternate Mondays would be used to fund Ladybarn's bid to become Britain's first Suburb of Culture in 2010. Ladybarn would in future be a big player in the promotion of not only the Big Issue but of the Big Society as well. Big Deal!

The choice of Ladybarn over hot favourites Beswick for this inaugural honour has shocked the world of culture and turf accountants alike. Certainly Beswick seemed to be in a better position to fund the event with an average per capita weekly wage packet of just under £190,000 as opposed to £37.02 in Ladybarn. In the end though it came down to facilities and Beswick was always going to struggle to come up with a stadium that could compete with the opulence and grandeur of the Stadium of Murk with its magnificent neo-Utilitarian interiors and state of the art light bulb. It beggars belief that this will be the first major event it has hosted since the National Rat-Baiting Championships of 1933 when a still youthful Charabancs team squeaked home against the middle-aged Opsimaths in a tail-biting finish.

The Festival is scheduled to begin at midnight on October 31st (the Feast of All Hallows in the rest of Manchester but still celebrated in Druidic Ladybarn as the first day in the lunar cycle of the Three Bridgets, a day when the husbands of the parish traditionally hide their copies of Razzle and tiptoe around the bedroom for fear of causing offence). Watch this space however since doubts have been raised about the state of readiness of the Stadium of Murk for the official opening ceremonies.

"The toilets alone are a major cause for concern", grimaced Fr Megson, clenching his knees provocatively. "Myself and Sean the Barstewart are working flat out to make sure that Dusty has them in a fit state for human habitation by the end of the month. Thanks to the generosity of the Chancellor, we can now afford to supply her with a brush. After that our main concern will be to ensure that she washes her hands properly before she starts making a mountain of egg and onion sandwiches to keep us going for the first few lock-ins. I hope people are patient and appreciate just how much pressure us administrators are working under".

More details of The Suburb of Culture extravaganza will follow. Anybody wishing to see a full programme of the scheduled events should send a stamped addressed envelope (don't attach the stamp too firmly) to either Sean the Barstewart or Fr Megson. Please include a £20 pound note and a detailed list of ideas about the kind of things that people do to pad out cultural festivals like what we are supposed to be organising. A list of experienced but currently unemployed lap dancers would also be invaluable.

Fr Megson